After I lost every match my first year in wrestling at the age of six, it was time to decide whether I would start another season in this grueling sport. I told my Dad I wanted to give wrestling another try. I thought, “Surely, sooner or later, I can beat someone.”
It was the first tournament of my second year, and my Dad took me aside before the first match to have our routine pre-match talk. What he said during that short five-minute period set the stage for the rest of my life. He kneeled down to my level, looked me in the eyes, and told me to go out there and wrestle for myself. He said, “Do you want to wrestle in this tournament,” and I said, “Yes.” He said, “Do you want to win this tournament,” and I said, “Yes, that would cool!” Then my Dad said, “If you want to wrestle and you want to win, you walk out there on that mat, wrestle for yourself, and do your best. Wrestle because you want to Brandon. Don’t wrestle for your Grandmother, friends, coaches, or me. We all want you to be happy. Win or lose, we will love you no matter what. If for some reason you don’t want to wrestle anymore, that’s is totally fine. I’ll love you no matter what. More than anything, I want you to be a good young man.” My Dad’s words of wisdom worked because I went 3-1 and earned 2nd place in that tournament. I went on to get 2nd place in State that year with a record of 20-7. That’s not too shabby for a second year boy, who had a full season of 1-2 BBQ in his first year.
After my Dad opened his heart and spoke this truth, I realized there was no exterior pressure on me. I didn’t have to win to be truly loved by anyone. As long as I did my best, that is what made me a winner. From that moment on, I had a new outlook on wrestling and life.
When I walked onto that Olympic mat in Sydney, Australia in front of the nation and all my family and friends, I remembered what my Dad told me about wrestling for myself and doing my best. I realized wrestling in the Olympics was pretty much the same scenario as when I was seven. I had to put my shoes and singlet on, walk on that, and beat the guy standing in front of me. Not much had changed in 17 years of competing.
As long as I did my best, God would take care of the rest. I did the natural, and God did the super.
Fortunately, I have the opportunity to e-mail and speak to many youth across the nation about wrestling and life. Many youth have problems with their parents, coaches, or teammates, which I’ll refer to as your support group. Maybe, your support group is not always there for you or is not giving you enough praise and encouragement. That is very tough, and I truly feel for you. I challenge you to have the courage to communicate with your support group in an open and honest way. You have to be willing to admit any mistakes, say you’re sorry, make a commitment to change for the better, and treat others the way you want to be treated. Work together to restore your relationships gently even if you don’t think you are at fault. Hopefully, with time, the cracks in your relationships will be mended.
A support group who wants to be part of your dream will make your experience so much more enjoyable. Love cures all! But, if for some reason, problems remain. Remember. You need to wrestle for yourself. If you love wrestling and have big dreams, don’t let what others say or do affect your ability to accomplish your dreams. Don’t let pride get the best of you. Remain humble and keep wrestling because you love it. As long as the benefits of wrestling outweigh the costs, keep putting those shoes on everyday. A career of wrestling on the mat, prepares you for a career of wrestling the responsibilities of life.
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